Articles » Just me

‘Daddy paid for my career’

First published on Parent24.com:

Are you doing your kids a favour if you bankroll their job ambitions?

Jaden Smith is a gifted child star. But when his parents Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith are the co-producers of his latest hit movie (the remake of the Karate Kid) are they sponsoring his career? And as for his 9-year-old sister Willow, would she have a much-viewed video if her parents were us?

This sparked quite a debate between me and my husband. His opinion is that if he were in the position to set his child up in his chosen career, he’d do it in a flash. While I’m not so sure if that is such a good idea.

Follow daddy’s footsteps

But being helped along in your career doesn’t belong solely to the rich and famous. The father who told his daughter to pick a study direction in either agriculture or his own profession, since he owns a farm and is a partner in a professional firm, comes to mind. Or the father who set up a whole new record studio because his son wanted to be a sound engineer.

I’m sure that these dads made an informed choice before committing to their child’s career. Ultimately it depends on what your child does with his opportunities that determines whether you made the right decision or not.

I’ve seen children who were given all the luxury and opportunity while Daddy was paying. Until the moment that he passed away, leaving them to suddenly learn how to cope for themselves – unfortunately with disastrous effects.

I believe that equipping your child with knowledge and the will to succeed is far more important than paving the way. And hard work has never stood me wrong. I admit this might just be a case of slight resentment and jealousy on my part for not having it easier in life.

So, when do we give in and boost your children’s future career? Is it part of our parental duty to ensure that your child is successful, whatever that may take? Or, do you believe your child will benefit more from the character building experience of fighting his own way to the top?

4 steps to surviving potty training

First published on Parent24.com:

4 steps to surviving potty training

As a parent, potty training and it’s accidents are something you’ll have to deal with. Here’s how.

Potty training is not for the faint hearted. No matter how much you invest in the ‘How to book/DVD’, the potty and the build up to the whole experience, you will get stuck with accidents.

This is your survival guide.

Step one

Before you start with potty training, invest in soap with a strong scent. Don’t pick your favourite soap. It has to be something you are never going to use again. Believe me, once potty training is done with, you’ll never want to.

You will need a bucket with a lid. Screw on preferably. You might also prefer to get a set of thick dish washing gloves. One pair is not enough, Murphy will intervene. And believe me, MARK THEM!

Also rescue drops or wine for the nerves, might not be a bad idea.

Step two

Wait for the first accident. Don’t worry, it won’t take long.

Step three

This is where you get to make a choice. Once you get the first poo accident, you can choose whether to wash that undie, or buy some more. Even if you wash the first one, be prepared to give in and throw it away. At least once. Some things are just too nasty to clean.

Step four

The best thing to do with a poo undie, is to first deposit the chunks into the loo. It’s during this stage that you start wishing your child was constipated. Then (dish washing gloves on) you take that “special” soap (remind the household members that it’s not for regular use) and wash that undie. As soon as you are sure that there is nothing left on the undie, add some more soap and throw it in the screw top bucket with water. When washing day comes around, take the undies out of the bucket, squeeze out water and add to the washing.

Voilà, you will have survived the potty training accident!

Now for a few Don’ts:

Don’t leave that dirty undie for too long. Once that smell sets in, nothing will get it out.
Whatever you do, don’t think you can take a short cut and throw it directly in the washing machine. Poo sticks.To everything!
Same with throwing that poo undie in the bucket without washing it first. Sticking your hand in that dirty water could be one of the worst experiences of your life.
And don’t think that a poo undie is the worst thing that can happen to you, because that would be Poo Art.

‘My baby walks funny’

First published on Parent24.com:

My baby walks funny

Did you know that pigeon toes (or intoeing) occurs in 2 out of every 1000 children? But wait, there’s more.

Soon after my little girl was born, I noticed that she was very bowlegged and I couldn’t remember any of my other kids having legs like that. When she started walking at 10 months I noticed how her right foot was pointing inward as she walked. She was also more prone to falling than her brothers were. So I made an appointment with an orthopaedic surgeon.

The doctor confirmed that she was intoeing and explained the reasons why. During foetal development the lower limbs start rotating inward around the seventh week, this makes the toes point towards each other. Later the legs gradually rotate out again and this may carry on during childhood, but by the time of birth, the feet are approximately pointed straight forward.

A small amount of twist in infant legs is considered normal. With my little girl, the rotation was slightly more than normal resulting in feet pointing inwards when she walked.

Since this condition usually corrects by itself, no treatment is planned for now. However, if she still suffers from it at 12 years of age, we will look at it again.

There are three types of intoeing :

1. Metatarsus Adductus (curved foot)

Metatarsus adductus, is the most common congenital foot deformity.

In Metatarsus adductus, the front part of the foot curves inward. It is usually due to the way the baby was positioned inside the womb and is normally noticeable directly after birth. In most children this corrects itself by the age of 4 to 6 months. Should the curve be unusually severe or rigid, the doctor will probably do a cast or give stretching exercises. Although this condition isn’t painful at all, it could present a problem with finding shoes later in life.

2. Tibial Torsion (twisted shin)

The most common cause of intoeing is tibial torsion, which usually becomes apparent when infants begin to walk.

Tibial torsion is a twist to the main shin bone. When you look at the leg from the front and the knee is straight, the foot joint is obviously turned inward. This is usually noticed around the time that the baby starts to walk. Most babies have a slight twist to this bone that disappears by the age of one year. The cause is thought to be due to the way the baby was positioned inside the womb, but can also run in families. This used to be treated with boots connected to a bar, but research showed that children that went untreated showed the same recovery as children that were treated. Most children will grow out of this by the age of 8 years. Even if the problem persists, research has shown that it doesn’t cause arthritis or problems with jumping and running.

Tibial torsion:

Affects boys and girls to an equal degree
Two-thirds of the time both legs are affected, but in most cases legs are not affected equally, with one leg rotated more than the other.
Occurs more frequently in the left leg than the right leg when in both legs

3. Femoral Anteversion (twisted thigh)

When intoeing starts in early childhood, it is most frequently due to medial femoral torsion.

Femoral anteversion is due to a twist in the femur close to the hip joint. It is less noticeable at a young age and usually comes to the parents attention around 4 to 6 years of age. The child will stand with knees and toes pointing inward. This too corrects on its own. Children with femoral anteversion tend to sit in the W position – with their knees bent and the feet to the side. Since this position reinforces the femoral anteversion it should be discouraged.

Femoral torsion :

Is twice as common in girls than boys
Almost always affects both legs equally
Is believed to be inherited, to some degree
Sometimes causes an abnormal gait and difficulty running

More about intoeing

Generally, children with intoeing are otherwise completely healthy and do not suffer from other abnormalities or diseases.

It usually does not cause pain.
It usually does not interfere with learning to walk.
It has not been linked to arthritis in adulthood.
It does not cause clumsiness.
Occurs in about 2 out of every 1000 children.
Is more common in infants and young children than in adolescents.

Useful websites

My child won’t get head lice. Right?

First published on Parent24.com:

My child won’t get head lice. Right?

This mom does some research into head lice after the initial shock of seeing them in her son’s hair.

Last night after a haircut, my oldest boy was sitting on my lap before bed time when I decided to check if the rash he had on his scalp had returned or not. That’s when I found it. It was a small baby one at first and a minute later the Big Mamma Louse! To tell you the truth, that Mamma Louse, was a lot bigger than I ever expected.

Yes, we got a notice from school that there had been an outbreak of head lice, but I wasn’t worried about it. I mean, we’re not head lice kind of people, right? Turns out we are. What a major shocker that was. I keep the boys clean, wash their hair myself, mostly so that I know the sand has been properly washed out. I even remember to clean their ears every now and then. But head lice?

Well, when mommy’s faced with a subject she doesn’t know about, she hits Doctor Google, that’s after arranging to go to the pharmacy for head lice shampoo the next day. It turns out the shampoo is not foolproof, and it might be hazardous to the little one’s health. Yikes.

Of course the moment you admit that your child has head lice, you get the advice and recipes. Everyone has the best method of getting rid of the little buggers. And some of them are down right scary.

Here’s what I found:

Head lice facts

Head lice are not a dirty-hair problem, it’s an all-kinds-of-hair problem.
They jump right? Wrong, they crawl. They spread mostly by head-to-head contact, sharing clothing, bed linens, combs, brushes, and hats. Oh, and they can’t fly either.
Head lice only survive on human heads, so you can’t get it from your pets.
They’ve got six legs with claws that hold on to the hair.
The Big Mamma Louse is about the size of a sesame seed, and a clear colour except after they’ve fed on human blood, then they’re a reddish-brown. Or in the case of the one I found, a combination of the two.
They live for about 30 days and Big Mamma Louse can lay up to 100 eggs (called nits) in that time.
The nits are really small oval shaped eggs glued to the side of the hair shaft at an angle. They can be dark brown to light yellow before they hatch. They hatch 7 to 10 days after being laid. The females start laying eggs 7 to 10 days after hatching.

Treatment

There are a lot of different treatments available for head lice. The most common are the head lice shampoos that contain a pesticide. These have strict instructions that you should adhere to. Now it might just be me, but I feel strangely uncomfortable using a pesticide on my child’s head.

Various alternative shampoos and treatments have now reached the market, claiming natural remedies instead of the pesticide approach. These are also very expensive and each one claims it’s the only one that can guarantee effective treatment.

These shampoos share one common fact. They advise you that the only way their product will be effective is with the combined use of a special fine toothed comb.

With a bit more research I found this interesting fact: If your child is under the age of 2, manual removal is advised. Use a fine toothed comb on wet conditioned hair every 3 to 4 days for two weeks after the last louse was seen. The water temporarily immobilises the louse and the conditioner makes the combing easier.

After all my research, this mommy is off to the chemist to buy a fine toothed comb.

What’s the point of Grade R?

First published on Parent24.com:

What’s the point of Grade R?

Do parents have to choose between structure and playtime for 5-year-olds?

My fondest memory of Grade 1 was building a huge clay crocodile. My mother remembers me selling my new pencils for 50c each on the first day. With Rivan turning 5 this year and the soon-to-be compulsory Grade R, I decided to find out what all the hype was about. I’d heard rumours of how tough Grade 1 is these days, but could it really be that bad?

The Department of Education has postponed the compulsory Grade R implementation with two to three years, now only to be rolled out in 2012 or 2013. Although crèches and pre-primary schools will be allowed to have Grade R classes, they will have to register and follow the departmental curriculum. This will then also allow them to apply for a subsidy from the Department of Education.

I could keep him in crèche for his Grade R year, allowing him one more year to be a little kid whose only job it is to play, or enrol him in the primary school’s Grade R and give him that added benefit of a structured and easier start to Grade 1.

I toddled off to my local primary school and put the Grade R teacher through the wringer. My first impression of the classroom was: ‘this is what my Grade 1 class felt like’. With little chairs and tables, pictures on the walls and everything marked with a big name tag.

The teacher explained that the workload the kids have to deal with in Grade 1 these days is miles away from what we did as kids. Sorry kids, no more playtime with clay. She showed me some of the Grade 1 school books. The school year only just started and already they are expected to write complete words. And not only the ‘See Spot Run’-type either. By February they start to write sentences. Without the foundation of Grade R, children cannot cope with what is expected of them.

I asked what the difference is between letting your child do Grade R in a crèche or in the primary school. She replied that it helps if your child becomes familiar with the big school environment. The work is structured and age appropriate, whereas a lot of crèches are just not geared towards providing the necessary foundation work. Some race ahead, placing too much pressure on the children, and others deal with the teaching of the basics incorrectly. That doesn’t mean that there aren’t any good pre-primary schools out there.

But for me, I think the structure of the primary school’s set up is the way to go.

‘Daddy paid for my career’

4 steps to surviving potty training

‘My baby walks funny’

My child won’t get head lice. Right?

What’s the point of Grade R?

Categories

Recent Posts

Subscribe via email

Blogroll

My mommy blog

Previous posts